My Ramblings

RAR! I don't think it's very fair to ban smoking in public places. I am a smoker, and I do realize my second hand smoke is harming everyone around me. But if they're going to ban smoking in a public place, surely they need to ban cars?? A car exhaust pipe gives off more toxic fumes than my bloody cigarette. Don't get me wrong...I don't want cars banned. But surely to not allow me to do one thing because it damages peoples health, then permit me to do another which causes more damage is a little silly?? And if the government is so concerned about our health, then why don't they make smoking in geeral illegal? Because they make to much money out of taxes on tobacco. It's ridiculous. I also found out the other day that if you convert your car to run off of vegetable oil (which is a brilliant idea to help save the planet) then you have to pay the same ammount in taxes as you would have done in petrol. So yay!! Let's go save the world and pay for doing so. It doesn't make any sense to me. Surely people could stop being so bloody greedy, step back, and think 'Yeah...let's save the planet.' The water powered car was invented by a man called Steve Meyer. He refused to sell out to Arab Oil Company for billions of dollars, which was offered to him only if he would shelf his invention. He wanted to world to have this amazing invention. He wanted to help save the planet. While he was alive Stan said many times he felt his life was being threatened. In March 98, Mr. Meyers was poisoned, and he died in the parking lot of his home town in Ohio. A week later, his water powered dune buggy and experimental equipment was stolen, never to be seen again. This man invented something that would have helped to start saving the planet 9 years ago, and he died for it, all so someone could go making the type of money where they have the ability to offer billions of dollars. What is the world coming to?

Hello. I've never had a blog before, but I've decided it's time. Mainly cause I'm really stressed out and have no one to talk to about what's going on. I find it easier to get my thoughts out in writing. That way I can ramble and it doesn't really matter. See there I go...rambling. I love my boyfriend. I'm sure of that. But we seem to be drifting apart more and more each day and it's tearing me up inside. I live hundreds of miles away from any family or close friends that I can lean on. We were supposed to be starting a new life together. Things were supposed to get better. And all we seem to have faced is trials and stress and chaos. We were both given the oppurtunity to move back to where we moved from. We only moved in the first  place because we couldn't afford somewhere to live. Now we've got a great person willng to flatshare. But my partners just started a new job. It's a great oppurtunity for him. He gets training and should be able to set himself up if he sticks with it. Yay!?! I'm not happy here. And what's the point in staying when every other day I'm being told to grow up and how unhappy I'm making him. Yes, I do need to grow. I'm only 20. But it's not something I'm able to do overnight. I have to go through things, and learn and when you don't really have a life it's hard to do. I don't know what the point in staying is. I'm making somebody I care about unhappy. That in turn is making me miserable. But the thought of leaving terrifies me. I love this man and when things are good they are brilliant. I am trying so hard to change to be someone that makes him happy. That's what I want. But then sometimes I get so stressed out because it seems what he wants is someone that aggrees with him on everything. Yes, i would be great to have no conflict, but I do have opinions on things. And they are not going to be the same as everyone elses constantly. Then again, maybe I am just being childish. I don't know. I wish someone wise would just take me into there arms, hug me, and tell me what the right thing for me to do is. I know what advice I'd give someone, and that would be to follow my heart. But my hearts trying to get me to go to 10 different places all at once. I feel I'm being ripped to pieces. Why can't life just be easy. Silly question. It would be pretty boring then. I should have said "Why does life have to be filled with problems you can't find the solutions to?" One line of a song keeps playing through my head. 'Should I stay or should I go?' LOL. Well this is enough ramblings for today. Maybe tomorrow will bring an answer.
A xx